Tuesday, July 26, 2016

Modern Romance by Aziz Ansari & Eric Klinenberg

Summary of the Summary of the Summary:

A fan of the show Master of None? Ever wondered how people found "the one" in the olden days? This book provides the answers.
A fun and informative read outlaying the differences between dating now and in the past.


Summary of the Summary:

Apparently a lot has changed in the dating world since the time of our parents, and even our grandparents. Aziz Ansari, and his sociologist friend Eric Klinenberg, explore this idea through the scopes of dating styles, cultures, methods, and more. Most of the information is a no-brainer, information you've probably already figured out yourself, but with a scientific backing. Nonetheless, it's interesting to read it all compiled together, mixed together with personal stories from interview subjects and amusing anecdotes and metaphors from the wit of Ansari himself. If you've watching Ansari's Netflix show, Master of None, then you've heard the majority of the information in this book, just in a
less formal and more narrative setting. I would say you really only need to read the book, or watch the show. If you are interested in experiencing both, read the book first, or you'll be bored, having learned everything from Netflix before.

Summary:

Aziz Ansari's book on dating culture isn't quite like your typical comedian's book deal. It has some personal experience stories, but it's not memoir. There are jokes and comedic elements, but it's not a comedy book. And even though Ansari's name and picture are prominently displayed on the cover, he has a credited coauthor, sociologist Eric Klinenberg. That's because Ansari didn't set out to write a book on his own experiences in dating. He set out to write an informative book, based in research, on why and how dating is so different in the world today than the world of our grandparents and even grandparents.

That isn't to say Modern Romance isn't amusing. It's got funny bits galore, saturated with Ansari's unique wit and humor, but it's claims are also backed up by some research and a lot of interviews with other people. Frankly, at only 288 pages, Ansari and Klinenberg's assessments are just dipping the toe in the water in the ocean of research that could be done in this subject. Their book serves as almost an introductory sociology course in modern dating. Each chapter presents a new idea, such as online and app dating, international dating culture, the 'good enough' theory, and why things have changed from the old days. Each topic is interesting in its own right, and the authors present their evidence and research, but then wrap it all up concisely presenting possible answers, but lots of further questions and possibly inquiry.

When I read this book, I thought it was cute and interesting, but nothing mind-blowing. It's mostly things you could hypothesize on your own if you thought about (or have thought about) but put in nice book form. Such things include the idea that marriages don't last as long because people don't feel the need to work on something if there's another option just an internet away; people didn't used to date as much because they married the people next door; people have a tendency to not settle down as much these days because they always think there could be something better; etc.

But it came apparent to me fairly quickly that this topic was of great interest to Ansari and was somewhat of a passion project. This realization came when I watched (after finishing the book) Ansari's Netflix show, Master of None. I enjoyed the natural tone of the show and the humor and thoughts that make it come alive, but some of the plots and points made became repetitive, as they mirror the exact ideas and thoughts presented in the book. Some of these points make up entire episodes, some are just offhand comments, but I found myself repeatedly going "I knew that" when they are brought up. That doesn't mean I enjoyed the book or the show any less, it was just like watching a movie right after reading the book it was based on. You already know all the beats.

Overall, I found the book a pleasant read, with some information dotted in. I wouldn't wait too long to read it though, as I think it will be dated fairly quickly based on how fast technology is moving, and much of the book concerns topics on modern technology and dating. Some of the points, especially the looking back to generations of yester-year, will always be valid, but as new apps and internet opportunities appear, so will new methods of dating, and they just won't be covered.

Final conclusions: worth a read, but if you're more of a watcher than a reader, just watch Ansari's Master of None. You'll get the point.

Still interested? Get it here.

A fan of the show Master of None? Ever wondered how people found "the one" in the olden days? This book provides the answers.

Disclosure: The Amazon links in this post are affiliate links, which means that if you click through and make a purchase, Amazon sends a couple coins my way. It won't pay the bills, but it may help me purchase my next book to review. Thank you for your support!

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